Ten Things You Don’t Want to Hear on a Plane

Posted: 02/05/2013 in Humor
Tags: , , , , ,

horrified expression

1.  There’ll be a bit of a delay, folks – there’s a slight problem with the engine.
2.  Oh good, there’s an extra barf bag in this row.
3.  Sorry for the delay – we’ll be taking off as soon as the pilot sobers up.
4.  I can’t seem to stop eating these peanuts, even though they make me really gassy.
5.  We’ll be starting our descent in…uh-oh.
6.  Ladies and gentlemen, please observe the “fasten seat belt” sign until we can figure out what’s causing the plane to shudder.
7.  Folks, if you look out your window, you’ll see…Oh my God, what is THAT?!
8.  My baby hates flying. Here, take my earplugs.
9.  We don’t want to alarm anyone, but several of your fellow passengers seem to have disappeared.
10.  Everyone duck!

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Comments
  1. Cute!

    I liked your one-act! Very clever!

    Jessica

    Laurie Holman: Funny Writer wrote: > Laurie Holman posted: “1. There’ll be a bit of a delay, folks – > there’s a slight problem with the engine.2. Oh good, there’s an extra > barf bag in this row.3. Sorry for the delay – we’ll be taking off as > soon as the pilot sobers up.4. I can’t seem to stop eating these peanut” >

  2. girl says:

    I am terrified of flying. Terrified. My family is flying to a wedding in May and I am already nervous about it! Once on the way to spring break in Florida I was sitting next to my cousin and listening to my iPod. Suddenly I smelled something really gross and I turned my head to the left and the two girls across the aisle from me were both throwing up in the bags. That flight couldn’t land soon enough…

    • Yuck! Maybe you should take noseplugs next time you travel (assuming they wouldn’t be confiscated by security)!

      On the bright side, if smelly fellow passengers are the worst thing that happens in the air, you’re probably lucky….

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